Talk:Epic Rap Battles of History 59/@comment-50.110.247.119-20160324184025
Hi guys! Bob here! With Julia Child VS Gordon practically confirmed..I decided I'd release a battle I've had done for two weeks. Hope you guys enjoy! :) Added a bit of Bobdave's lines because I thought they were great, that goes to him! Thanks! Gordon: I'm getting all up in your grill, get out if you can't take the heat! Don't believe in failure? Tell that crap to your kidneys! You're like Mr. Rogers, I'll vomit your so called pristine cuisine. This Marry Chandelier fill-in wouldn't be chosen for either team! Like a knife on a steak, I'm sharp, soon you'll be prepared. Charbroiled and served on a silver platter cause I spit rhymes rare! Blimey, it seems Retirement Home here is wonkey. Probably cooks fish raw for fun, what a useless donkey. Stop going so strong for nothing, take a vacation. Get some sympathy for these burns from your foundation. Of course I'll win, I always keep it rough. This recipe calls for leaving Mrs. Doubtfire sunny-side-up! Julia Child: You know, I bet life is just too hard for you to take. Gourmet? Your food likely tastes straight out of a Microwave. With all your preaching, maybe a fish should be killing. Letting you in a resturant, now there's Hell's Kitchen. Always dropping the F word, but in my book. You seem like a washed up Simon Cowell styling himself as a cook. I'm sweet as desert, you'll have a heart attack if you don't learn. 16 Michilien stars, but how many did you deserve? Why are you angry? Tell me, is it because you're jelly? That you're getting cancelled while I rock a shelf of emmys? You're so hateful, quite more than I can bear. With all your fakery, I could call that a Kitchen Nightmare. I brought Taste to Americans with the right seasonings. I fail to see your reasoning, you don't even get your own ingredients! Put your life in jeopardy by letting Ramsay choose what you eat. How's it feel to be served by a Woman? bon appi tete! Gordon: You got me over boiling point, woman, how could you be better? I got restruants spanning Japan to Australia! I'm more sour in a battle than a lime to the eyes. Won't be taught how to cook by Mrs. Half Drunk All The Time. You need a diet, you seem a bit out of breath. Excuse me? This fat wrinkly swine's talking to me about being a chef? You aren't making cuisine, keep out of the kitchen. Because you would drop the Apron first in my competiton. Your simplistic plain garbage is just as bland as ya. Maybe you're like me, just boring, jacking up the grandma. When it comes to being a critic, I don't need your lectures yet. Mastered the Art of French Cooking? Well I perfected it! Julia: Talk to me about the business I exceeded in? Honey, I don't have to scream to make people listen. Stripping people of their dreams, why should I battle you? 'Cause it seems like your daddy oversalted your attitude. I'm a slow-cooker here, and I bet you're getting tired. Must be shameful to get deep-fried by a Child. I've seen your Masterchef, and I'm just not a fan. Resturants named after you? that's pretty bland. You're hot butter to me, I'll make you melt. Judging talent when you don't have any yourself? I got you coolwhipped, you're easy to bake to nothing. You Debby-Downer your team, I got masterpieces in the oven. Keep your Beef Wellington and your Downtown Abbey followers. I'm making millions feel happy, you're trashtalking Jamie Olliver. Call me Rachel Ray, leave you done in 30 minutes flat. You may call me a Donkey, but boy, you're the ass.